GOD HATES PAYPAL - INTERNETS TERRORISM 101

Unless you have been living under the proverbial rock for the past week you will already be bored to tears by tales of Julian Ass-ange and the wikileaks controversy. After already embarrassing the American administration with the release of the 'Afghan war files', wikileaks followed up by threatening to release a quarter of a million US internal diplomatic cables that they aquired off of a guy named Bradley Manning who was pissed off at the army due to his being demoted several times and being considered a pretty shitty soldier EDIT: an unknown source.

Of course the US got SUPER PISSED at this and immedietely threw manning into 23 hour a day solitary confinement, DDOS'd the fuck out of Wikileaks, aquired DOX on everyone involved and buttfucked interpol into launching an international manhunt against wikileaks frontman Julian Assange based on Swedens 'suprise sex' laws, ('suprise sex' sounds so much nicer than rape doesn't it?), but apparently this was actually more about a condom breaking and had been thrown out of court several years ago.

Meanwhile FOX news pundits issued fatwas for the head of Assange live on air. The best part was so far the cables had actually made the Americans look good compared to what we all thought before, they've been actively preventing war with Iran, realise Cameron is a prick and their diplomats generally come off as well-meaning-folk-faced-with-a-near-impossible-job-to-do. Trust the administration to turn the only decent piece of PR they've had all year into the biggest shitstorm of the century so far.

America making a cunt of itself is nothing new of course and this story really only gets interesting sometime around LAST THURSDAY when Anonymous (internet terrorists) declared war on PAYPAL, AMAZON and MASTERCARD amongst other less notable targets due to their backing down in the face of the administration and cutting off funds / hosting to wikileaks. The attack came in the form of the internets first ever opt-in botnet. Requiring not even an /i/kit, an enterprising anon had set up a web page with a built-in Javascript LOIC, with the HIVEMIND button. All the user had to do was log into the URL, hit HIVEMIND or select an IP of his choosing and join the zerg rush. After a few hours of lazorz PAYPAL went down, MASTERCARD was fucked for a few hours, fucking things up good and proper for those out christmas shopping during the biggest shopping weekend of the year (lol) but AMAZON stood steadfast due to their godlike EDIT: googlelike servers.

The empire struck back with DDOS attacks of their own, even those these are technically illegal everyone knows the government are as quick to use them as we are and wikileaks was soon down. Some redneck BEEKEEPER calling himself 'th3 j3st3r' joined the attack, revealing a LOIC tool of yet unseen capablities, th3 j3st3r claims this tool known as 'xerxes' can take down a site via a single low-spec linux machine. When faced with the inevitable 'youtube or it didn't happen, he delivered. When the script kiddies get their hands on this consequences will never be the same.

WORDS: MY NAME IS COLD-BLOOD AND I AM A FUCKING DICK-HEAD THAT WILL GET DOX'D

a version of this article appears @ dontpaniconline.com

1 comment:

This is a place of falsehood and artistic fiction. Only a fool would take anything written here as fact.

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