PA REQUEST
‘Newfag has added you as a friend on Facebook’
Of course you have never met this person before. You're guessing someone on Campus just saw your awesome profile picture and as a result wants to be your new awesome facebook friend / student fuck. Awesome, I mean the picture is awesome right?
God this site pisses me off anon. The amount of fucking bullshit Spam I get sent to me via this thing is fucking unbelievable. It's either shitty 'targeted' ads, useless updates or total fucking losrs that actually want to be friends. Fair enough it gave us Buck Foris but other than that it's nothing more than a shithive of pure fail and AIDS. Now the whole universe gets to use social networking to get to my personal information. Isn't that what /b/ used to excel at? Now every fucking newfag with a facebook account gets to search my name, bring up hundreds of photo's and browse through them one-handed, great, thanks facebook! Now I get to feel liek' Jenna Jameson.
The reality of Fagbook is nothing more than the new 0891 50 50 50, a party in your living room where everyone is invited (but nobody leaves the house). As opposed to going out and meeting people, shaking hands, sharing bodily fluids and developing genuine relationships Fagbook, in the vein of Gallagher allows you to start the revolution from your cum-soaked bedsheets.
And there's the crutch, Fagbook users, so enamoured by the relative ease of internet relationships slowly drift farther and farther into Fagbook land until it becomes their only connection with 80% of the people they know. 'So how's Jem lately, haven't seen her in ages?', 'Oh she's fine, she facebooked me the other day to say she's fine and isn't doing anything. Then I facebooked Steve and he says he's fine and isn't doing anything, oh, and I facebooked Dan and he's fine and currently making himself a sandwich'. You know the type, you haven't seen them in months, they didn't bother coming to your Birthday / club night but are guarenteed to Facebook you afterwards and tell you about how pissed they are they missed your thing maaaaaaan.
Facebook is the antithesis of Anonymous culture, as opposed to your work existing before yourself, Facebook is all about your imaginary self existing before your actual self. It has been suggested that the number of Party pictures on any given facebook is inversely proportional to the amount of partying said facebooker actually gets around to and in the realms of PR / the media this should serve as a grave warning. Facebook party guys don't actually party, they don't actually know whats going on, they just check their profiles and decide to just stay in actually. What happened to being 'in the know?', oh right, everyone got 'friends in common' and 'upcoming events'.
The fact is facebook can only really tell you one thing about a person i:e how long they spend on Facebook, from the sort of shit I've been getting these days I'm starting to think Facebook fits the internet wierdo steroypre more than niggertits. We need an epic win thats going to atke these fuckers down a peg or too guys. I don't mean passwords or gorefloods but something longer lasting, a terrifying reminder of all that sucks about facebook. I propose we turf the pavements.
For great justice.
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